What is Religious Trauma and Spiritual Abuse?
*This blog post is not intended to diagnose, neither is the intent to say all religious communities perpetuate religious trauma.
Religious communities/ affiliations can offer meaning and purpose. However, it is also true that religious communities can cause harm. Religious trauma refers to trauma that takes place within the context of religion. Religious trauma experiences are complex and varied, just like other forms of trauma.
Trauma is an emotional or physiological response to an awful event like an accident, natural disaster, violence, physical/ sexual/ emotional abuse. You do not have to be a victim of the abuse or harm to experience trauma—meaning you could be a witness to the harm/ event. Trauma can also manifest itself over a period of repeated harmful experiences. Religious trauma is the body’s response to religious beliefs and structures that overpower an individual’s sense of safety. The body’s responses can be emotional, physical, or psychological.
Some common manifestations of religious trauma can look like:
Confusion, lack of identity
Impeded development (i.e. sexual, social, relational, emotional development)
Fear of expressing one’s self or sharing personal thoughts
Existential fear and fear of uncertainty
Being told you are sinful or going to hell
Poor decision making skills
Traumatic responses to both new and familiar spaces and relationships. This could also include familiar music, sounds, or smells.
Incongruence or cognitive dissonance
Experiencing gaslighting and/or manipulation
Struggling to set healthy boundaries
Scrupulosity and/or very ridged thinking
Difficulty experiencing sexual pleasure and/or longing for sexual freedom
Experiencing marginalization based on race, gender, abilities, sexuality, etc.
Justifying systemic oppression/ non-inclusive practices with religious text or religious teachings
Not feeling free to leave your faith community
Difficulty forming health relationships
Experiencing spiritual abuse
In recent years “Religious Trauma Syndrome” (RTS) has been used in research and clinical communities. RTS is not an official diagnosis, rather a term used to identify common symptoms that are consistent among individuals who report significant religious trauma. Symptoms can range in severity, but typically describe the outcome of experiencing “authoritarian, dogmatic, and controlling religious groups and belief systems.”
Spiritual abuse has significant overlap with religious trauma, however, it is slightly different because it does not have to take place within a faith or religious system. Some spaces where one might experience spiritual abuse are self-help spaces, political environments, yogi spaces, therapeutic spaces, and medical communities. Some examples of spiritual abuse include:
Abuse of Power: Leaders of organizations do have a certain “power” within their communities. Sometimes this power can be misused to take advantage of individuals. An example would be, violating your boundaries, making you feel afraid to challenge leaders/ authority.
Dogmatism: This is when a set of beliefs are held very rigidly, with no option or acceptance of being questioned or challenged. These rigid beliefs can become oppressive and they tend to reinforce shame and control.
Gaslighting: This is a manipulation tactic which eventually leads one to question their own sanity. An example would be having a religious leader or organization tell you that your own experience cannot be trusted or that your experience is not real.
Infantilization: This is when you are treated like a child or in a way that denies your actual age and maturity. As an adult, it is often underlined by the belief that you are not capable of caring for your spiritual needs, development, or exercising your full autonomy without the organization. Infantilization also results in the suppression of normal child development, where cognitive, social, emotional, and moral stages of development can be arrested.
Intimidation: This is when leaders/ organizations/ religious members use fear to control, ultimately frightening you enough to retreat. Sometimes this manifests as a fear of being blackmailed, retaliation, or fearing possible repercussions. An example would be: “if you do not do [insert action/ belief here] you will burn in hell for eternity.”
Love Bombing: This is an attempt to influence you by first demonstrating affection and attention. It can be used in both positive and negative ways, both by individuals and organizations/ communities. When used negatively in a religious context, religious members/ leaders can overboard you with affection and essentially place you on a metaphorical pedestal just long enough for you to feel a connection/ acceptance, then eventually stop the affection, leaving you with a demand for obedience, a lack of boundaries, and feeling obligated to the group.
Manipulation: This is exploitation, control, or using religious influence to take advantage of emotional vulnerability. This could also include using confidential information against you.
Marginalization: This is a treatment towards a person or group specifically to make you feel insignificant and/or less than due to minority status. There are many ways this may manifest, some include, overt and covert statements, comments that make you feel inferior, or excluding a minority group/ individual because of minority status. This includes the use of religious text, speeches, or doctrine to justify acts and words of racism, homophobia, ableism, fatphopia, xenophobia, transphobia, etc.
Shaming: This requires actions/ words used against you, which cause painful emotions. Often these are attacks on who you are as a person, and sometimes done in public. In the context of religion, shaming is often done with the use of religious doctrine, scriptures, etc. to “prove” one has done wrong. Feelings of shame often leave individuals feeling humiliated, disgraced, and even hatred towards self. This is often used as a means to control behavior or continue participation in the organization.
These experiences can be subtle and subversive. Not everyone will experience all of these, and some might not experience any. Religious trauma can be a very triggering topic. It is difficult to acknowledge that our experiences may have been unhealthy, but for religious individuals or communities it can feel like threatening every aspect of life—community, relationships, money, parenting decisions, ancestral lines, to core identities. Validating religious trauma within a context where religion is an essential part of life can feel like an attack. An important essential part of healing is knowing that you are not to blame for the abuses and harm inflicted on you. Religious trauma and spiritual abuse is real and your feelings are valid.
Revitalize Wellness Counseling strives to be a safe space for those impacted by religious trauma & spiritual abuse.
For more resources on religious trauma recovery, follow here. And here to contact & schedule with Revitalize Wellness Counseling.
